Conspiracists, those individuals who consume and produce conspiracy entertainment, have exploited the alternative media for decades. By scaring their audiences senseless, these conspiracists enjoy both the notoriety and money that comes from pandering to the worst fears of the body politic, at a few cents a click. Since that does appear to the case, why not try to mitigate their influence by christening a new holiday, just for them?
Predictions are all the rage nowadays, especially from certain areas of the Internet. Christian Patriots ran a story alleging that the so-called “Islamic State” will launch a first strike nuclear attack within the next twelve months. Funny, I remember when the “North Korea wants to nuke Austin” claim was exposed as the hoax that it was; how is this any way fundamentally different from the Christian Patriots story? Perhaps conspiracists just want an excuse to senselessly scare their audiences into donating towards the black hole that is propping up Charles Dyer’s mug into yet another round of activist legal defense fund scams?
Allegedly, there’s also supposed to be a stock market crash this upcoming September, or thereabouts. I can’t help but chuckle, but I remember George Hemminger conning his audience for years about the imminent “economic collapse” that he eventually admitted he just roleplaying about. Ironic, isn’t it, that almost no one has called out Gerald Celente when he was completely wrong about the so-called “Crash of 2010” that was supposed to be the socio-economic collapse all the preppers were nearly salivating in anticipation for; as Celente likes to remind everyone, “current events inform future trends.”
The latest series of predictions all revolve around the Jade Helm 15 military exercises in the American southwest (including right here in Texas) that are set to begin on July 15th, ending on September 15th. Conspiracists showed up in force to the Bastrop County Commissioners Court (the legislative branch of that county’s government) during their town meeting this past April 27th in order to cast aspersions upon what U.S. Army Lt. Col. Mark Lastoria was presenting before that legislative body. Unless they are genuinely preparing for a Red Dawn invasion scenario now before July 15th comes to pass, libertarians such as myself are just not going to take these conspiracists seriously at all; besides, why waste time filming a depot of Humvees when you can be defending Texan ranchers instead?
What this is really about is nothing more than cartoon politics, plain and simple. These conspiracists’ intend to distract from real grievances, such as dragnet wiretapping, civil asset forfeiture, and the gradually emerging cashless society, because their goal is not to tell the truth about anything, or to help you increase your own personal freedom, but rather, to sensationalize the hell out of non-issues in order to get both their “fifteen minutes of fame,” and make a quick buck off of their gullible audiences. Although some of these conspiracists, like the Truthers, birthers, and tenthers, might sincerely have the best of intentions, they are still inadvertently paving the path to hell by unwittingly serving as pawns of the statists. This is dangerous to the rest of us who are expressing our dissent by highlighting the arbitrary and capricious nature of government itself, which does not require elaborate conspiracies, real or imagined, simply because it gives statists a convenient excuse to condescendingly belittle our legitimate grievances vis-à-vis guilt by association; what finer way is there to easily chill dissent than by fake dissent?
Naturally, there is a reasonable question to ask here, whether such fake dissent is promulgated by “guess what I know” types, or actual government lackeys? Conspiracism increases opportunity costs, because the time and effort spent on proselytizing… whatever… is time and effort squandered. Imagine if we were able to free up the time of genuine people, who care about freedom, for more productive tasks; the results would be nothing short of astounding. Committees of Safety, much?
Hard as it may be for some of you to hear, conspiracists, by and large, are just yet one more special interest group, just like the sovereign citizens, the social justice warriors, and even the so-called “men’s rights activists,” because they are all examples of controlled opposition. Absolutely none of these miscreants are allies or colleagues of mine because they are more than happy to backstab a gubernatorial candidate like Debra Medina whenever it suits their reformist agendas. Perpetuating the tall tales so common to patriot mythology only accomplishes to deceive, inveigle and obfuscate the nature of what Americans are facing during this time period.
Admittedly, there was once upon a time where I entertained and passively accepted their nonsense, because I naively believed there might be a kernel of truth to it, but I refuse to do so any longer. Conspiracists deliberately make it unnecessarily difficult for me, as well as others, to restore constitutional government, or to pursue any other productive objective. I cannot violate my conscience anymore by pandering to these manipulative Internet pundits anymore, so I figured the best comeuppance, besides ridiculing their nonsense as being antithetical to human liberty, would be to give them their own holiday.
Yes, you read that correctly – I think conspiracists absolutely deserve their own holiday, and I would like to suggest that it be held on February 29th every leap year. These conspiracy hobbyists would probably jump for a chance at holding their own “pride parades” where they get to “come out of the closet” as believers in all of this tripe. On that day held every four years, and clothed in their politically correct language, conspiracists would eagerly celebrate this or that calamity, because as nearly everyone who is mildly knowledgeable knows, conspiracists never desire a solution or mitigation for what ails the body politic, but simply an opportunity to wallow in their vision for the end of the world. Finally, I suggest this new holiday be christened “Death of America Day” (DoA Day).
There you have it. If you a conspiracist, or simply a friend or otherwise associated with one, why don’t you suggest to them that they celebrate DoA Day next February 29, 2016? That day, they may rail on about Georgia coffins, post office torture rooms, and the Philadelphia Conspiracy to their heart’s content, while leaving the rest of the time in between their holidays to the responsible adults who understand the anatomy of the State and who are doing their best to, at least, shrink government back down to its constitutional cage.
Do Americans really need another Oreo cookie to remind everyone that failed predictions are the bane of the alternative media? Hopefully, with the celebration of this new “Death of America” holiday, the conspiracists can be appeased, so that relief can be provided for the rest of us, who are actually serious about our freedoms, can get back to work doing whatever we can to secure our liberties during the 1,460 days that now have been freed up, instead of being sidelined by these circus freak side shows that statists use against libertarians as their ace up the sleeve.
Exposing the evils of the State, not by screaming bloody murder about unprovable theories, but by taking effective action to oppose those who imagine themselves to be our rulers, is the actual remedy needed to bring about a truly free society at some point, not pontificating about “Sandy Hoax” or whatever suspiciously violent event happened during this week’s news cycle.